Which Would You Choose – Life Experience or "Stuff"?

by Steve Sjuggerud.

This month is my 10th wedding anniversary. So I thought I'd share a story of one of the many "little-but-big" things I learned from my wife. I am lucky to share my life with her...

I couldn't believe it...

A friend of my wife's wanted yet another purse... that cost thousands of dollars. She already has a closet full of them! What's the point of another?

My wife asked her a simple question: "Which would you prefer... Life experience or stuff – like another purse?"

The friend thought about it, and she actually said she preferred the stuff. Hey, to each her own.

My wife and I try to focus on the experience over the stuff... For example, our kids (ages seven and five) are probably the only kids they know that don't have a PlayStation, or an Xbox, or a Nintendo Wii. They don't have a ton of stuff. But they're oozing with life experience...

Our kids have seen the world... They've been as far north as Iceland, and we toured much of it. And they've been as far south as New Zealand, traveling much of the North and South Islands by car as well.

Yet we don't have big flat-screen TVs in our living room or den. I can understand why big movie fans and big sports fans want 'em. They're just not important to us. (Are we the last Americans to actually have regular TVs?)

The great thing is, life experiences don't have to cost much at all (particularly if you can use some frequent flyer miles)... Our family just went to visit my folks for a week in Wisconsin, and I came back with most of the money in my wallet. Playing in the lake, riding ponies at the State Fair, and unbeatable home-cooked breakfasts from Mom. Everyone had a great time. And it sure didn't cost much.

If you're caught up in "stuff" – if you "need" another thousand-dollar handbag – then you've got to realize, the acquisition of stuff never ends. That flat screen won't be worth more than you paid for it. And neither will that handbag. You'll never get ahead. You'll never really "have money."

I define living well as 1) having time with friends and family, 2) pursuing my passions, and 3) well, not worrying about money. The nice thing is, you don't need a fortune to live well by that definition.

So which is it for you? Do you value life experiences or "stuff?" Which do you put a premium on? Remember, you can't take the stuff with you – and you'll be busy working for the rest of your life to pay for the stuff.

By the way, my wife's friend thought about it, and later she called and said, "You know, I thought about what you said... I think you're right. It really is about the experiences, not the stuff."